I'm still his Dominant. The city let us break the permanent contract but we have to stay in a temporary one for three months. Then he can find someone else. So I asked if he needed anything, and tried to be like, cordial. And it just devolved into a fight because--
[ He laughs, and looks down. ]
Because I'd moved out, right, I let him stay in the house? But he started looking for an apartment he was gonna get. Except he didn't tell me that, even though I'm still his Dom, and when he finally did tell me I freaked out because it's another thing he just didn't communicate with me about. And it brought up...all of this, the anger. The resentment, the bitterness. And I hate being that person, I hate feeling this way.
[ And that, really, is why he's here to talk about it now. Everything he's said so far, it's context. He looks up at Caleb, and takes a sip of that coffee. ]
I, erm...Hope Mikaelson, she killed a guy on the Network. It was someone important to Nick and to Kyle, and they're...well, I love Nick. And Kyle's important. I wanted to take care of them and I didn't want to be obsessing about Stephen while I did. And this...
I'd talked to this other girl. Goddess. Persephone. She wanted someone to remove her ability to love, permanently. I said no, but. I did...make a potion to take away the heartbreak she's feeling now. Talking to her and doing that, it made me think. Maybe I would be happier if I removed my heartbreak, too. And then when Nick and Kyle needed me, I asked Anna to do it, temporarily. And she did, and it was like...
God, it was like this weight was lifted from me. But it all came back after, and ever since that. I'm tempted to take that potion myself, kind of...unbind myself, from all those feelings.
[ He pauses, collecting his thoughts, and he chews his cheek. ]
I don't know if that'd be like. Cheating. Or if it's a good idea, like. Should someone get a free pass from heartbreak? Should I let myself feel all of this, even the...bitterness and anger, because it's somehow better long term? And then I thought, maybe the person I should talk that through with is you.
no subject
[ Nate takes a breath. ]
I'm still his Dominant. The city let us break the permanent contract but we have to stay in a temporary one for three months. Then he can find someone else. So I asked if he needed anything, and tried to be like, cordial. And it just devolved into a fight because--
[ He laughs, and looks down. ]
Because I'd moved out, right, I let him stay in the house? But he started looking for an apartment he was gonna get. Except he didn't tell me that, even though I'm still his Dom, and when he finally did tell me I freaked out because it's another thing he just didn't communicate with me about. And it brought up...all of this, the anger. The resentment, the bitterness. And I hate being that person, I hate feeling this way.
[ And that, really, is why he's here to talk about it now. Everything he's said so far, it's context. He looks up at Caleb, and takes a sip of that coffee. ]
I, erm...Hope Mikaelson, she killed a guy on the Network. It was someone important to Nick and to Kyle, and they're...well, I love Nick. And Kyle's important. I wanted to take care of them and I didn't want to be obsessing about Stephen while I did. And this...
I'd talked to this other girl. Goddess. Persephone. She wanted someone to remove her ability to love, permanently. I said no, but. I did...make a potion to take away the heartbreak she's feeling now. Talking to her and doing that, it made me think. Maybe I would be happier if I removed my heartbreak, too. And then when Nick and Kyle needed me, I asked Anna to do it, temporarily. And she did, and it was like...
God, it was like this weight was lifted from me. But it all came back after, and ever since that. I'm tempted to take that potion myself, kind of...unbind myself, from all those feelings.
[ He pauses, collecting his thoughts, and he chews his cheek. ]
I don't know if that'd be like. Cheating. Or if it's a good idea, like. Should someone get a free pass from heartbreak? Should I let myself feel all of this, even the...bitterness and anger, because it's somehow better long term? And then I thought, maybe the person I should talk that through with is you.