i can't make you think anything, but i can help you feel happy feels?
also blow you, if you're in the mood.
[ as far as propositions go, that one sucks. but quota is, unfortunately, still a thing he has to think about. and now that his former sub is a dom, he's at a serious risk of not meeting it. ]
[ He's had some practice by now with the whole make people chill thing, so he's more confident about not fucking it up now.
Rowan knows where Caleb lives by now, but he forwards the address anyway and tidies up the place— not that he's messy, but he can like, prepare tea and get snacks. ]
[ Rowan isn't expecting much of anything when he arrives at Caleb's door. He knocks and hesitates to see if there will be an answer or if he should just let himself in.
From the outside, he knows he does not look as rough as he feels. He's gotten scarily good at hiding his own thoughts and feelings when it comes to appearance. (Well, other than blushing, which is an entirely different thing.) But Caleb would be able to feel the waves of loss and sadness coming off of him, even if Rowan stands tall and looks neutral when he steps through the door. ]
[ It's ... honestly a little weird, if only because the last person to hug him -- just plain old hug him -- in maybe five years was Citra and she's gone now. But at the same time, Rowan feels like he's stumbling blindly here.
He palms the back of his neck, ducking his head slightly, but shaking it. No, not weird. ]
[ He did take the time to set up the tea on the coffee table. Caleb's not sure bypassing grief is particularly healthy so he doesn't want to try his thing until they've talked, at least a little. ]
[ He nods meekly and follow Caleb into the apartment proper, noticing the tea but not thinking about whether he wants to drink it or not. It's just there and he sits down on the couch without making a move towards it, just staring at it but not seeing it. ]
I think I die back home. Like... for real this time. And I'm supposed to protect her.
[ Rowan sighs, not sadly but with mild frustration, because this is going to be hard to explain. ]
The AI that runs my world... It ran the numbers on Citra and I. On the odds of each of us changing the world if we kept doing what we were doing.
She would be pivotal. I had a 39% chance and it couldn't specify how that would be.
[ He shrugs. ] I never expected to amount to much. I decided a long time ago I would die for her. I guess I just assume that's how it's gonna end, one way or another.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
text | un: lucifer
no subject
also blow you, if you're in the mood.
[ as far as propositions go, that one sucks. but quota is, unfortunately, still a thing he has to think about. and now that his former sub is a dom, he's at a serious risk of not meeting it. ]
no subject
and while I super love the offer, I'm also super not in the mood. hence the happy feels.
no subject
no subject
I'm on my way. Thanks.
no subject
Rowan knows where Caleb lives by now, but he forwards the address anyway and tidies up the place— not that he's messy, but he can like, prepare tea and get snacks. ]
no subject
From the outside, he knows he does not look as rough as he feels. He's gotten scarily good at hiding his own thoughts and feelings when it comes to appearance. (Well, other than blushing, which is an entirely different thing.) But Caleb would be able to feel the waves of loss and sadness coming off of him, even if Rowan stands tall and looks neutral when he steps through the door. ]
no subject
Is it weird if I offer a hug?
no subject
He palms the back of his neck, ducking his head slightly, but shaking it. No, not weird. ]
no subject
I'm sorry.
[ He doesn't know who's gone, but he's pretty sure someone is. ]
no subject
Citra's gone. She's...
[ She's so much. Not everything but close. ]
no subject
You love her. Come on, let's sit down.
[ He did take the time to set up the tea on the coffee table. Caleb's not sure bypassing grief is particularly healthy so he doesn't want to try his thing until they've talked, at least a little. ]
no subject
I think I die back home. Like... for real this time. And I'm supposed to protect her.
no subject
[ Caleb sits down too, an arm still around Rowan. He knows a little about Rowan's world, hopefully enough to put together whatever Rowan tells him. ]
no subject
The AI that runs my world... It ran the numbers on Citra and I. On the odds of each of us changing the world if we kept doing what we were doing.
She would be pivotal. I had a 39% chance and it couldn't specify how that would be.
[ He shrugs. ] I never expected to amount to much. I decided a long time ago I would die for her. I guess I just assume that's how it's gonna end, one way or another.
no subject
[ He's confused about many parts of this. Namely, why Rowan would even want to change the world. ]
... is there a... war or something?